Poop Is Brown

I just finished reading this article on cereal companies being forced to reformulate kid’s cereals or stop marketing them to children. The idea behind this is that childhood obesity is on the rise, so we need to take the sugar and calories out, or as they phrased it “raise the nutritional value”. The blinders these people have stopping them from seeing the obvious must be industrial sized because I’m certainly not oblivious to the fact that fat kids belong to crappy parents. That’s it. End of story.

Kids cereals were always higher in sugar & calories because children (used to) burn more energy. Now these sad-sack excuses for mom’s & dad’s allow their cherubic little rays of sunshine to sit on their fat asses all damn day playing PS3 instead of forcing them to get out of the house. It boggles my mind seeing the number of plump 4 year olds shoveling shit into their mouths and mommy & daddy are just smiling on. Holy shit, you’re kid’s a fucking tub of lard, stop it with the Coke & Chips and give him a jump rope. There’s nothing wrong with giving children “no-good-stuff” once in a while, but today’s convenience oriented parents just give little Emma and Jacob whatever they want whenever they want it. Learn to say no!!! Yes, they’ll cry. Deal with it. It’s part of being a parent. A child is not a clever accessory, it’s a human being, and you need to learn to instill discipline and rules so they know how to behave in society.

Cereals used to be the worst of parent worries because of all the b.s. rolling around about sugar causing hyperactivity. Thankfully, someone finally put it together that it’s the kids that are hyper (if anything sugar is a downer, check out the research). Should children subsist solely off of Sugar (no) Honey (wrong again) Smacks, NO, but as part of a balanced diet and regular activity they are an enjoyable allowable treat. Instead we have these lazy parents pulling the government in to police the food because they’re unwilling to simply raise their own child. Having sex & spitting out a kid does not make you a parent. It makes you a breeder. If anything we should pull the government in and force people to stop having children unless they can prove they can be responsible for a child. Take Junior to the park, buy your daughter a bike, get that kid moving. Children’s cereals are not some great evil scourge of the Earth. They’re fun. They taste good. And in reasonable amounts regulated by conscientious parents there is nothing wrong with them. Urgh, people piss me off.